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Top : Parents Asking Parents
 

My daughter is having sex!

Help! my daughter is 16 and has just came to me and her father and told us she has been having sex. I am really having a hard time knowing how to handle this.

~ Kim

Comments:
well this may be realy difficult for you to come to terms with shes come to you because she feels she can trust you to understand, all you have to do is talk to her about it and discusse it with her be understanding about it dont shout at her you will only push her away good luck
 
wow...this is a hard topic, but i remember when i was younger, like seven, and i used to hear wierd noises coming out of my parents room..wondering what it was, i looked one time and wanted to know...now that i know what they were doing i became curious. so maybe your daugter heard something about it and became curious. or her boyfriend pressured her into it, eighter way, it might not be her fault. good luck
 
you and your daughter are so lucky that she chooses to talk to you about this HUGE change in her life. talk to her like you would talk to a best friend. discuss the inherent danger in having sex, like std's and becoming pregnant before you are ready. teach her how to use a condom correctly. tell her you are available to answer ANY question she has, and then, BE available.

i feel blessed beyond credibility that my children shared such things with me. i did my level best to help them in this part of their journey to adulthood. sometimes they asked difficult, even embarassing questions. but, i tried hard to put my embarassment aside in order to help my kids.

there is no point in trying to stop her or restrict her activities. as heinlein wrote "once a woman decides to express herself on her back there is nothing that will stop her." this also applies to boys. both young men and young women will find a way to get around the harshest restrictions. in doing so you will be cut out of the loop.

it is so much better to be in the loop.
 
God has blessed your family because she feels she can come to you with this very private matter. She probably has realized that the sex hasn't fulfilled the part of her life she thought it would. She has questions for a reason because kids don't brag to their parents.

I would explain thw "hows and whys" of sex like listed in other blogs, but don't forget to address the reason for her questions. She might regret giving herself away or it might cause more stress in her life and she might want to know how to control or stop the situation.

God forgives all confessed sins. Today she can live a clean forgiven life. She can chose to stop and save herself for marriage where we all know sex is awesome and fulfilling.

God bless you for having an open door for your daughter. Keep it open.
 
i also agree it's a bid deal that she was willing to come to you. I definately think being understanding is going to show her whether or not she can come to you with anything BUT i think you still have a responsibility to tell her the truth. God never intended for us to have sex outside of marraige. that connection with no commitment can do a lot of damage. Especially emotionally.
I think as long as you show her you genuinely care about what happens to her and then share with her the truth you can't go wrong.
Even if she doesn't like the truth she will respect you for telling it in the long run.
My personal opinion is that teens don't need more friends they need caring parents to show them god's standard out of love.
It's all easier said than done. I pray you will find the right things to say and do. Good luck.
 
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