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Top : Parents Asking Parents

18 and throwing it away

My daughter had plans to go to her boyfriends prom and his parents heard some rumors about her and pulled the plug on prom. Her prom is in one week and I have forbid her to go with him as he did not stand up for her honor. I just found out they are sexually active. She has a full ride to a Div I school on a swimming scholarship leaving in August. Top 1% of of her HS class and is ready to chuck it all for this guy. She wants to go live with her ad now because I have taken her car away as I found out she is skipping swim practice on a regular basis to see him. I will now drive her to and from her functions so this is why she wants to move in with her dad. She turned 18 1 month ago so I can't stop the move and I will not cave on the car as she assumes I will to keep her at home. What should I do to make it till August?

~ Mary Jo

wow thats rough. It's hard when they are basically grown. They are at a point where they are going to be able to make their own decisions in life. I don't know what the perfect answer would be exactly but if it were me I would try my best to mend our relationship. Not necessarily give her whatever she wants but try to find ways to remind her how much you love her no matter what she does. Unconditional love is a powerful thing. I mean look at the love God has for us and how it changes our lives. You can look for opportunities to share good advice and Godly wisdom with her but be careful not to push her away. If she were younger it would be so much easier because you have the parent card to play. I say pray for her and ask God to get her attention. Encourage her to do what is right and above all else show her LOTS of love.
God is never too late. The only thing we as parents can do is our best to raise our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. From an early age children have their own perceptions and will.

The absolute best thing anyone can do for his child(ren)is pray. Grab ahold of God and pray. WE are not meant to control our children. What we percieve they are or are not doing in life is not really up to us-only God knows the real purpose for each child/person. Pray God will destroy the plans and purposes of the devil in your childs life and establish her in HIS purpose. Pray until you see HIM do it.
My daughter threw away 10 years on an abuser she met when she was 17. She refused to listen to anyone in our family and not even her friends. Ten years and four kids later she finally wised up. I wouldn't take her college education over those kids for anything.
She's trying to finish college now - and she's brilliant (but not a lot of common sense). I spent too much time being upset with her decisions, looking back I was trying to take the control that belongs to God. Once they are of age, what they do is between them and God. Be ready to stand by her, continue to calmly give your opinion but let the control go.
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"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

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