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Vol. 2010 Issue 7 ~ July

Here’s what I’m hoping for this summer…longer stretches with my kids. Really. And that statement surprises me, I have to say. I’ve made it known that I’m not “one of those kinds of moms”. I love my kids. Like super completely love them. And I capital L love the kids of my friends. But, well, let’s just say I won’t be opening up a daycare anytime soon. So for me to not be feeling cooped up and claustrophobic at the thought of a summer with my kids at home is a pleasant turn of events and a gift to me, not to mention to my kids.

So, it seems, I’m hoping for conversations that just happen because we’re together more often. Having the time and luxury to ask, “What’s on your mind, baby?” and being answered with something that blows me away, something I didn’t expect. I want to know my kids more deeply by the time they head back to school in August. I want to understand them better. I want to know what gives them joy, what drives them crazy, what makes them sad, what they lay awake at night thinking about. I want to look them in the eye at the end of each day and tell them that I love them and know them a bit better than the day before.

My kids are moments from walking out of this house and into the world on their own. When I say moments, I mean like five to ten years (depending on their college choices). And what may feel like an eternity to young moms, five or ten years is a breath, as those of us who have older children can attest to.

And this summer, I don’t want to rush. I don’t want to overplan. I don’t want to do whatever it takes to stay on a schedule or grab much needed alone time to satisfy this introverted soul of mine (though I probably still will try). I just want to sit in the same room with them. I want to play a board game. I want to bring them with me on my run and see what happens when we linger at the park. I want to read a book with my daughter and finish a collection of New Testament stories with my son. And I want to share a few more of my own stories, being as appropriately authentic as I can with them, because it’s occurring to me more and more that God knew every mistake and misstep I made when He decided I’d be a mom some day, and He would like me to pass along some of my wisdom to the kids He’s placed in my care.

And when they look back on this summer, I want them to remember that it was marked by special moments with Mom…little moments with Mom…lots of moments with Mom. That she showed up, she put her book down or walked away from her computer, or sat on the couch, or asked to play a game. That Mom was there. That they feel more known and more loved. That they know their Mom better, but better yet, that they know their God better. Now that would be a good summer.

Submitted on : 28-Jun-2010