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Vol. 2008 Issue 11 ~ November

The Truth

I used to think that authors and speakers had their acts together. Must have their acts together to go out and do what they do. Surely their houses were clean before they left for the morning to come and speak. After, of course, getting their well-behaved children on the bus and sending their husbands off with a kiss and a packed lunch.

But here’s the truth. Writers and speakers, at least the ones I know, do not have their acts together. In fact, there’s a chance we’re slightly more of a mess than you are. I’m now speaking for myself here, but I figure out my life through writing and share what I come up with, and sometimes just the process without any answers, with you, the reader and event attender.

I sit in a neat house, but not a particularly clean one (according to my husband).

I make dinner four nights a week, but sometimes it’s just cheesy eggs or a pizza.

I iron my husband’s shirts, but you don’t want me sewing any buttons on any piece of clothing.

I plan to volunteer in my son’s classroom but I will not and have never been a room mother, and I will not, nor would you want me to, bake anything for any class function.

I am kind to my pets, though a) I don’t like animals, and b) we haven’t seen one of our cats in about a week.

I love my daughter but she’s in middle school and vacillates between sweet and you’ve-got-to-be-kidding-me-talking-to-me-like-that.

I love my son but he’d rather watch cartoons than play a board game with me apparently.

I love my husband but our issues can’t be summed up in one sentence.

I love my work but sometimes can’t even justify to myself that writing and speaking are actually a job and sometimes I don’t write something for a week at a time or more.

I exercise almost every day, but don’t ask me how long I actually run.

I eat pretty well, starting my day off with a fresh fruit smoothie and cup of green tea, but don’t ask me how many cookies I ate yesterday.

I love my friends dearly but I don’t spend anywhere near as much time with them as I wish I did and probably have time to do.

I know community and relationship is what I need but I’m an introvert who tends to isolate herself.

I am interested in social justice issues like HIV/AIDS, global poverty, clean water, and almost anything to do with Africa, but don’t ask me the last time I did something kind for the woman who lives down at the end of my road, or how much money I spent last month at Ann Taylor Loft when I haven’t really needed new clothes since, oh I don’t know, 2004 or so.

The mask is off. So, if I’m coming to speak at your church and I show up with not a hair out of place and in a matching outfit (as someone from my church accused me of doing each week, as in how dare I?), and I maybe make you laugh or even think a little bit, please hold it loosely. Please don’t judge me and think, “What can she possibly know about my life?” Because, sweet woman, I know more than you might guess to look at me. And don’t put me on a pedestal, by any means, because I’ve got my stuff…maybe not the same stuff that you’ve got, but trust me, it’s stuff alright.

So what I’m saying is this. We’re all in this together. No one is better than the other. I’m a mess and you’re a mess, but you know what? That’s what Jesus came for.

© Elisabeth K. Corcoran, 2008

Submitted on : 01-Nov-2008